i really do not know what im going to do now. im just walking aimlessly so that i can tell myself at least im moving somewhere. this year is just filled with failures. its really piling up and im forcing myself not to care so i would not feel how heavy the burden has become. im trying to get myself as occupied as possible so i would not notice how big my problems are.
its already october and if my sense of foresight is still good, i will need a lot of positive energy to face november. i have a big decision to make by the end of the month so october, please let me have some fun, the type i really enjoy (something i havent had for years) or at least give me a little break so that my judgment will not be clouded.
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