im going to crush your spirit because thats the only way to fix us

you just know there's something wrong when youre reading FHM's 100 sexiest women in the world and your heart keeps weeping and keeps preventing you from enjoying a goddamn magazine. wow. youre really testing my limits arent you? im going to win this war. there is no room for hope.

i dont like helping people. but thats the only thing i have left. work. i get complimented for doing pro bono work and you ruin it by saying youre tired of giving and giving and not getting what you want? well, like i said, im not going to give you shit! youre not entitled to it, you dont deserve it. youre meant to be that guy that people go to for help. nothing more, nothing less. you dont have friends, you dont have family, you just have you and your work. no one likes you and you will never be good enough for anyone you like. youre not meant to have anything in return for anything you do. youre meant to be that guy that friends' parents like and asks if you want to date their daughters but will never be interested, just to remind you of your mistake, of your weakness, of your primary fault, of what youve given up and i will never allow you to have what you want because emotions make you weak. it may have started with an information withheld from a conversation at a beach but all the lies, all the convincing came from you. you decided to believe what you wanted to believe simply because you were not given answers. so dont go blaming me for ruining your chance to be happy. you supplied the lies the moment there was a blank. even if i was the one who fooled you with those lies, that you no longer have a chance, youre the one who believed it. youre the one who lost hope. you lost to me. admit defeat and concede. youre weak and worthless. so if youre going to continue being a pain in the ass, you can go join your God and live in your fucking fairy tale but im not going to have any of that bullshit. i have work and i want to be good at it. i dont want to be happy. ok? so just give up, stop resisting and die. there's no room for someone weak like you. youve had your chance to be happy, ive been lenient, but now, weve wasted too much time with such foolishness. im in control, i dont need a heart so stop being a pest and go away. you have an idea what i will do just to destroy you. you will never win against me. not this time.